Another Day in a Life of Going Nuts

The downside of this unusually mild and almost snowless winter that doesn't seem like winter, is that the urban wildlife is more active than it would normally be, and the rodents go out of their way to make sure I’m aware of this. 

So here’s the latest…

February 1, 2024

 

"The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men, gang aft agley.” wrote Robert Burns.

 

Believe it or not, this half-comprehensible Burns line is in a poem titled, "To A Mouse."

 

A rodent of all things. But why?

Well I never knew this line belonged to a poem until two days later when I read through the verses for the first time ever… and?

I have no idea what Burns was writing about.

 

Unfortunately that Burns line was updated and made understandable by John Steinbeck, with, “The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

I think not understanding "gang aft agley" feels better than "often go awry" which I do understand.

 

After all these years I think I figured it out... there’s a difference in nuance between the best laid plans and the best plans laid, because the best laid plan may not have been the best plan to start with.

 

So why am I writing about this?

 

That Thursday afternoon I thought I heard something run across the roof, and my first thought was the denial, "It can't be."

 

Minutes later, and certain this time, I heard whatever it was run back across the roof again, "What? How? It's not possible."

 

Nonetheless, I went outside for a look at the roof from the ground, and sure enough a black squirrel was up there looking down at me. This one is grey, but it's the same headache.

You're not Cute,
You're not Funny,
And you're definitely not wanted up there or anywhere else around here.

I went back inside and asked Kie to come out for a look. She came out, saw the squirrel too, and confirmed I wasn't hallucinating. And I kinda wish I was.

My adjoining neighbour (I live in a semi-detached home) has no meaningful trees near his half of our shared building, so when I made what has now become my best laid-to-waste plan, I never considered his side might also be part of the problem. But... and I deserved to be kicked in the butt for these buts... his neighbour on the other side has a row of cedar trees nearly as tall as the cedar I had removed... but I never considered those a possible route... but obviously the squirrels did, and found the I-295 to the roof.

 

Anyway, I went over to get a close-up perspective, stood right beneath that other cedar tree, and looked up. Sure enough and worse, the upper branches of that tree are nearer to that corner of our roof in common. I hadn't expected this.

 

Complicating the situation is that my neighbour’s neighbour is an absentee owner, and that dwelling is vacant, and it’s been vacant for at least a dozen years. I have no contact information for the owner, so I have to wait until she makes one of her rare appearances and obtain permission.

 

So in the meantime…

 

I’m cursin’ from the ground, just cursin', from the ground,

Not a glorious feeling, another squirrel’s around.

It’s sitting up there, looking down at me,

I’m shaking my fist, got to cut me some tree.

 

This stanza matches that famous tune, Singin’ in the Rain, but I won’t be dancing around with an umbrella in the backyard any time soon like some kind of a… nut.

Is it any wonder that I’m feeling like Donald Duck tangling with Chip ‘n Dale in those original old Disney cartoons?

 

After all, we share the same first name... and troubles with rodents.

The Oddblock Station Agent