I Just Love New Technology!

Surely you didn't for a minute believe this title... did you?

Tools of the Trade

Maybe I should've called this "Fools of the Trade" but then again there is that very fine line between...

The following may have appeared in a newspaper 31 years ago but many of my true feelings toward new technologies are little changed.

One thing is certain 31 years later... that tire iron still works the same way it used to... but I cannot say the same for that 31 year old computer and the several that have followed since.

Tire irons don't need upgrades, or new apps, or a charged battery either.

The Experts

Right about now is the right time to play that Stephen Sondheim song, "Send in the Clowns."

Experts. 

We all know these types of guys. 

They can fix any computer problem. 

When all else has failed though, how many times have you been told simply to shut of the #@&$* computer and restart it?

That said though, if this expert really knew what he was doing, then an hour earlier he should've had the microwave working for you to heat up your cold coffee so you could put it in the cup holder that slides out... when you push the button.

I almost forgot... an hour earlier your coffee wouldn't have been cold.

Behind the Scenes

The truth is stranger than fiction, unless of course it's not fiction to start with.

Someone obviously has their finger right on the pulse here... 

Need any more be said to explain why technologies do not work the way should, or should not work the way they do, or plain just don't work.

But don't let that poor dead mouse fool you. This system shown actually functions better than most governments but don't just take my word for it though.

Go ahead! 

Test the waters! 

Go ahead and deal with a government bureaucrat somewhere for something that should be simple and straightforward and then see what happens.

I Actually Understand this next Question

Really I do!

Yes! I actually understand this question! 

Perhaps it's similar to something I've asked David when I've needed his help with my computer. This boast now made, knowing the answer is another matter entirely.

Never mind the need for a new computer though because these types of questions also apply to any or all the peripherals you have in use. 

See that? 

If I can use technical words like peripherals to make it appear that I know what I am talking about, then anyone can do it.

Meanwhile I'm trying to figure out what type of food should be served in a satellite dish... just in case martians land unannounced in the backyard.

Now isn't this app to blow your boom box?

The Oddblock Station Agent